Episode 10. We return to our friends in Are You the One? land once again in the aftermath of another disappointing Match Up Ceremony.

Kylie says it sucks to see three beams in Week 7, especially since one of those beams is already a confirmed match. So really, they only got two new beams.

After Kai drunkenly told Jenna he’s still in love with her, Jasmine has decided she’s over Kai. Sorry if that was a lot of confusing pronouns. Basically, Jasmine doesn’t want to be second for anyone, so she’s seeing herself out of this toxic Kai situation.

Nour also seems to be ready to put aside the Kai drama. She asks Jasmine if they should talk about the fight they had at the Under the Sea Party. Jasmine’s like, nah girl. She doesn’t feel like there’s a need to talk through it, because she plans on just getting over it. They toast to their newfound friendship? “Cheers to going on our rollercoaster ride!”

Let’s see. What else is going down tonight? Amber says she feels so lost because she doesn’t have a solid relationship in the house. She apologizes to Justin for moving in on his relationship, and Justin says she doesn’t owe him an apology because the feelings were mutual. Could Amber be Justin’s match? It seems like MTV is playing this up a lot.

Elsewhere, Danny and Kai are hanging out. Danny says he cares about Kai and he wants Kai to do well in this house. Danny quotes Samuel Beckett to Kai because of course he does. This man is actually perfect. Kai wants to know how Danny feels about his gender expression, and Danny says that putting on a skirt and dancing around just makes him feel sexy. I’m ready to marry Danny whenever he’s ready.

Anyway, time for FORTUNE TELLING with Basit and Amber. Basit is going by the name “Miss Jello” and Amber is “Miss Hello.” I couldn’t really make much sense of this except that they used this opportunity to pick on Justin for “making connections in the house with other people” and Max for NOT making connections in the house with other people. That pretty much sums up the morality of the house. If you try to flirt with too many people, you’re a ho, but if you focus on one person, you’re not open to the process.

In spite of the cute ice cream date they had last week, Paige is still not sure about Remy. Paige says she’s scared Remy is her match because he’s just like her ex. She says she’s closed off to relationships with guys because she’s never received proper treatment from guys.

Poor baby Remy overhears this and is very sad. Can you imagine hearing someone you like so distressed about potentially being your match? I felt all the feels here. Remy says, “I just feel like trash in the way she looks at me. And it hurts, because I’ve had other people look at me like trash.” Remy says he just wants something nice to happen for him. Justin is all of a sudden giving sage advice now that he’s all boo’ed up. He tells Remy, “Literally just be vulnerable and show her you.” And this is not a bad suggestion.

Are we ready for a CHALLENGE? Feels like it’s been forever. This challenge is all about communication. The couples will be forced to build furniture together, but only one of them can look at the directions while the other one builds the actual furniture. Please sign me up to be the person reading and not building. K, thanks.

In what feels like the show sabotaging these couples’ truth booth opportunities, they force the best communicator and the worst communicator to work together. Color me not at all surprised when Basit is ranked the best communicator. Justin is ranked the worst communicator.

The winners of this challenge? Amber and Max. Danny and Nour. Remy and Paige. So obviously we know Remy and Paige are going to get voted into the Truth Booth. Poor angel Remy is excited but also stressed out about going on this date because he’s not sure where he stands with Paige.

The three couples go on a helicopter ride. Max stares off into the Hawaiian skyline and thinks about how much he wishes Justin was there. Later when they sit down to talk, Amber asks Max if he’s worried about Justin, and Max is like “I’m very aware that everyone wants to fuck him.” Amber’s like, “He is pretty cute.” Max tells Amber he’s not opposed to having a romantic connection with her, but he’s into Justin. We know, dude. Amber is DTF both of them. Pretty much every girl in the house wants to be Max and Justin’s girlfriend, and I can’t blame them.

Elsewhere, Remy and Paige are chatting. Remy says he was anxious about the date because sometimes he gets the feeling that Paige is ashamed of parts of him. Paige says the reason why she’s been so confused is because she doesn’t want her emotions to be seen as undesirable. Her ex-boyfriend used to shame her for her emotions. Remy says Paige makes him want to be nicer, be better. “You challenge me, and I see my best self come out when I’m around you.” Aw. I’m dead. Paige is sure that Remy and her are going into the truth booth and she thinks maybe she doesn’t have to be so scared.

Just as Paige is opening up to Remy, it begins to rain. They decide to take this as a good sign. Also, apparently they think God is peeing on them, because Paige calls it a “golden shower.”

Guess what? When they get back from their date, Paige and Remy find out they’re going into the Truth Booth. They’re excited about potentially being a match and they think they’ve put together a foundation for a good relationship. Remy says he wants what’s best for Paige whether they’re a perfect match or not. Danny says they don’t have any more time to be wrong.

The tension is building. I just can’t stand it.

They’re not a match. Surprisingly, I don’t cry. But I wanted to.

Remy is very sad, obviously. Jenna says Paige really loves Remy’s infatuation with her, but they need to move on. Paige says, “I’m newer to relationships, so everything I’m feeling right now is a little bit bigger of a deal, which is why I came in so guarded in the first place. I am so lost.” Poor angels.

Kari, on the other hand, doesn’t have time for this BS. She’s frustrated with how bad they’re doing, and she says she doesn’t want to be the queer season to be a season of losers. She tells the rest of the house, “We need to go into survival mode. It’s happening right now.”

They all sit down and decide to figure out who the matches are. These geniuses figure out Jonathan and Basit are a perfect match. Jonathan and Basit are so excited. This is pure and good content. Jonathan tells Basit, “thank you for taking the time to be patient with me.”

Next, they figure out: PLOT TWIST. Nour and Jasmine are a beam. Nour’s like, “Of all the bitches in this house, this bitch.” But they both seem open and excited to explore this connection.

I just want to note that clearly the group is using a spatula as a talking stick during this strategy meeting, and it’s super cute.

They decided at the next match up ceremony, they need to find out of Danny and Kai or Max and Justin are a perfect match. Max is getting emotional. I feel for him because y’all know Jax is my shit. But also… at the end of the day, this whole experience is almost over, and whether or not y’all are a perfect match, you can still be together, right? Please be together.

The next day, Nour and Jasmine spend some time together to figure out why they’re a perfect match. They’re noticing stuff they have in common like… liking horses? That’s some deep shit right there. Nice work, ladies. Anyway, I’m glad they’ve decided to love one another because the fighting was super uninteresting. And now at least they understand that the reason they were fighting so much is because they’re so similar.

Going into the match up ceremony, they have a strategy to find out if the match is Danny and Kai or Max and Justin. Danny seems apprehensive about it. He says he could be Kai’s match, but he’s sad because that means Max and Justin mare not a match. That would make me sad too, dude.

Anyway, MATCH UP CEREMONY TIME.

RAPID FIRE:

Jasmine picks Nour

Basit and Jonathan

Max picks Justin (Max says he knows he won’t be able to be all in if Justin isn’t his match)

Kylie picks Danny

Kai picks Remy

Amber and Paige

Jenna and Kari

And the number of perfect matches is… Fuck, they’re making us wait two weeks to find out.

So according to AYTO Math, either all of the matches this week are correct or Max and Justin are not a match. Odds are not great then that Jax is real, because in the previews it definitely looks like there will be another match up ceremony. Nevertheless, I’m going to hold out hope and BELIEVE. I love Max and Justin together. Additionally, I hate Danny and Kai together because Kai is actual trash and Danny is the best human ever. Soooo…. COME ON, MTV. GIVE US JAX!

Obviously my standout person of the week is not a person but a couple: Justin and Max. I, like every other girl in the house, want to be their girlfriend.

And I guess I’ll see you in two weeks, since AYTO is taking a break for the VMAs. Booooo. Why is MTV trying to pretend like they still care about music? Give it up, guys, and give us this quality reality TV content we all crave.

Anyway, enjoy your break. Pray for Jax. Bye.