Lil Nas X released a music video on March 25, 2021 that changed the world.
Okay, maybe it didn’t change the world, but it did get people talking, and it definitely incensed a huge chunk of America. For those not in the know, I live in Mississippi, which doesn’t have the best history when it comes to supporting LGBTQ+ rights. While I’ve been incredibly fortunate to live within the safe bubble of academia for many years, teaching public high school gave me some insight to just how strong homophobia is in my area. After hearing about another teacher’s experience, where their class said, “You can’t like that video because it’s gay!”, and after watching countless TikToks parodying and celebrating “Montero (Call Me by Your Name),” I’ve decided we need to talk about Lil Nas X’s artistic accomplishments.
Let’s do a reading of “Montero (Call Me by Your Name),” and discuss how skillfully it was crafted, and how it’s an absolute celebration of identity in the face of adversity.
First, a couple of notes on the choreography. The video features choreography by pole choreographer Kelly Yvonne, who has worked with FKA Twigs in the past. Many were quick to call Yvonne and Lil Nas X out for creating a video very similar to FKA Twigs’ “Cellophane.” Both videos feature a character descending into some sort of other world, but the messaging of the two videos is different. Where “Cellophane” seems to depict a personal journey, ending with rebirth (from being covered in red clay), “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)” is about releasing the negative people or practices in one’s life in order to fully accept yourself.
The video begins the message, “In life, we hide the parts of ourselves we don’t want the world to see. We lock them away. We tell them no. We banish them. But here? We don’t.” Lil Nas X then says, “Welcome to Montero.” Montero is Lil Nas X’s real name, but it’s also a play on the “call me by your name, I’ll call you by mine” theme of Luca Guadagnino’s 2017 film. The song is named after him, but it’s also potentially about a lover that he then calls by his name, Montero. Whew.
The story of the video starts in Eden, full of lush otherworldly plants, a guitar-playing, long haired Lil Nas X, and an alienesque serpent. It should be noted now that Lil Nas X plays every role in the video, from the creepy serpent to Satan himself. The Adam-styled Lil Nas X attempts to run from the Serpent, but he sees the beastial form everywhere, in the plants, in the clouds. In some sense, Lil Nas X can’t escape from himself. He can’t simply run from his feelings for other men, despite feeling it’s “wrong” because of religious reasons.
The entire first verse describes a romantic interest Lil Nas X pursues, despite feeling that his crush isn’t “livin right.” It’s possible, after all, to party without actually feeling any better as a person. Eventually, Adam-Lil Nas X falls for the Serpent and they kiss (or more??).
The chorus and pre-chorus leave no room for misinterpretation. This is a song about sexuality. The chorus of “I’m not fazed, I’m only here to sin/ if Eve ain’t in your garden, you know that you can” moving into the chorus of “call me when you want, call me when you need” clearly states that Lil Nas X is a man looking for a relationship with other men, but regardless of how excited he is about his crush, the speaker still thinks it’s a “sin.” We’re still firmly within the bounds of religion here, but longing for a full acceptance of oneself.
After the garden, the viewer arrives in Heaven, or some approximation of it. In “Heaven,” everything has a light color palette and draws influence from historic fashion (i.e. the wigs). Everything is orderly and pristine, but Lil Nas X has transgressed and is on trial. His clothes are different from the others (again, all played by him), both pink instead of blue and more disheveled in nature. Instead of structured denim, he wears a pink fur and no shirt, setting him apart from the guards that carry him. The lyrics here are all about desire, a list of things Lil Nas X wants to do, even though his peers are visibly judgemental. The two guards that carry Lil Nas X to a council of judges are binary in appearance, with one wearing a dress and the other wearing a more structured denim shirt.
Lil Nas X is sentenced to Hell and stoned with butt plugs, which signify his “crime,” I guess. I’m reminded of John 8:7, “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone.” Instead of a stone here, we get a butt plug. Paired with this famous verse, it makes me think that even though Lil Nas X is being crucified for a crime many religious people commit. You know, since being gay isn’t really a choice. Instead of self acceptance, these people have pushed themselves so far back into the closet as to think they’re safe from persecution. Lil Nas X is sacrificing himself, in a way.
And then we get to the part of the video that everyone’s been talking about, the descent to hell. Wearing a red wig, tight boxer briefs, and thigh high black boots, Lil Nas X begins his descent down a pole, twirling and flexing all the way. Honestly, pole dancing is an extreme athletic feat. The entire descent shows Lil Nas X being proud, sexual, and frankly very hot. He’s feeling good about himself now that he’s freed from the confines of Heaven/religion.
Once in Hell, the only thing left to do is become king. Lil Nas X gives Satan a lap dance (oh, and Satan is also Lil Nas X), and then, once Satan is lulled into a false sense of security, Lil Nas X snaps his neck and claims the throne.
What’s the message here? I think a lot of conservative Christians have decided that Lil Nas X gave Satan a lap dance because that’s what’s on the gay agenda, but that’s looking at the story with a limited view. I think there’s a good chance that people like Ben Shapiro got angry about this video without even seeing it, because one look at the whole picture shows that Lil Nas X, feeling cast out by religion, has now used what the church told him was “negative” to create a work of art. If being gay is going to send me to Hell, he might have said, at least I can be king there instead of feeling like an outcast. Escaping the judgement of others is worth something.
I think this video and song provide a message of empowerment, even if you have to look a little deeper than the provocative lyrics and images to find it. Living a lie is oppressive. It drains you.
Lil Nas X tweeted a message to his younger self after “Montero (Call Me By Your Name) released, saying, “i wrote a song with our name in it. it’s about a guy i met last summer…i know we promised to die with the secret, but this will open doors for many other queer people to simply exist.” This is a declaration, and hopefully a door opening for others.
Think about the impact of that sentence, “we promised to die with the secret.” How many things are you willing to die with in order to keep others from finding out? How hard would it be to keep a huge part of your life a secret from others? Your family? Friends? What if you could never speak about or be proud of your partner for fear of being rejected and banished by your entire support system? Five seconds of thinking about the issue makes it clear that the church often stifles people out of fear, not out of any actual concern for their well being.
Did Mary just write a nearly 1500 word essay about how she loves Lil Nas X and thinks his music video is cool? Yes. Now the next question might be, why would she do this? Two reasons.
One, I think “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)” is a legitimately good music video with stunning visuals. The song is an absolute bop.
Two, I think people need to stop condemning art before they even see it. We all need to think about things with more grace and acceptance. There’s a time to fight, but music videos aren’t something you should get riled up about. This is a statement from someone who has been badly hurt by religion, a proclamation to not let the chains of the past bind him anymore. Isn’t that, in some ways, what Christianity itself is about? New beginnings and an escape from old ways of thinking? Maybe it’s time to start thinking about how we can better understand others instead of looking for ways to hate.